Splash!

We're in the pool! You can see for yourselves at this link. Now the wait begins. Interestingly, the couples before and after us on the website both have toddler boys. I'll have to spend some time looking through the site to see what the pool looks like this time around.

Tomorrow I'm off to buy a new infant car seat among other essentials. You know, just in case. Apparently our car seat has "expired." Who even knew that was possible?

Almost there

Wow, I can't seem to keep up with any of my blogs! Since I last posted, we have completed...

• Two home visits
• Individual meetings for Jeff and I
• Physicals for Jeff and I
• Family photo
• Family introduction letter
• Autobiographies for Jeff and I

Huh, I felt like there was more. Not that this hasn't kept us plenty busy mind you.

Jeff and I have wore the same outfits in our family photo for the family introduction letter in both of our adoptions to date. So we took the "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" approach and wore the same thing again! After I lost a bunch of weight, I got rid of all of my clothes EXCEPT this jacket specifically with this adoption in mind. It's a funny little look back at our last five years. Particularly as my hair has gotten shorter in each photo. This will have to be our last adoption as I'm not sure I could pull off a bald head...

The talented Emily Andrews took our family photo this time. And if you think this is good, you should see the individual shots of Ian! I particularly like that he has a second chin in this pic. And if you look closely, you'll see his little index finger pointing. He likes to point out EVERTHING right now so this is totally him.

All of our paperwork and meetings are now complete. We're waiting on one more letter of reference and then we'll officially be in the pool! And then...we wait. And prepare. And wait some more. Fortunately we have Ian to keep us distracted while we wait. Believe me, there is no better distraction than a 20 month-old little boy.

Application & Intake Meeting

We've been busy little beavers over here in the Harris home (shout out to all the other OSU grads). Here's a quick look at what we've done:

• Completed our initial meeting with the counselor - more detail below
• Created a draft of our photo collage - this is a 3-5 page collage of casual pictures reflecting our family, home, vacations, hobbies, etc. It's basically designed to give birthfamilies a realistic view of our lives.
• Updated my autobiography - another 3-5 pages for each parent recapping our life, values, experiences, etc. I was already up to 5 pages when I updated my autobiography for Ian's adoption so this time I had to edit before I could add. Truth be told, I'm still at 6 pages so I'll trust the counselor to edit from there. I mean, this is my life we're talking about! I'm hardly objective.
• Signed the agency contract - this details the process and our commitments. We also paid for the next step in the process, the Home Visit.

Our Application and Intake meeting with the adoption counselor was last Wednesday. Much like last time, we really just used the time to get caught up and to discuss our desire to add to our family through open adoption at this time. For our first A&I meeting, I recall worrying about what to wear and what to say. I think I was concerned that this counselor, whom we'd never met, would solely determine whether I would become a mother. Now that we've been down this road, I'm much more comfortable with the people and the process. In some cases, the counselors may determine that a prospective adoptive parent is not a good fit with the agency. But on the whole, I realize now that these counselors' primary work is trying to accurately portray us to find the right match. At least that's my take on it anyway.

We've scheduled the first of two Home Visits for tomorrow. Considering our counselor only works 3 days a week, we try to be as flexible with scheduling as possible. Fortunately she had an opening so we jumped at it. It wasn't until later that I realized we needed to do a little work on the guest room which will be Ian's new room. Some of you may have that room where all the miscellaneous stuff gets tossed. For us, that is the guest room. Unfortunately, the Home Visit entails walking through EVERY room in the house. So that junky guest room would need to get an overdue cleaning. I'm sure the counselor understands the lack of storage for all those old baby toys and what not. But I'm not comfortable showing her a room you can hardly even walk in! After several late nights and a truckful of Goodwill donations, I feel so much better. The room still needs another deep cleaning but it feels good to purge all that junk! Next step is converting it from the guest room to Ian's room.

Please pray that our Home Visit goes smoothly tomorrow. We've managed to schedule it on our 15th wedding anniversary. What could be a more appropriate celebration?

One more time!

If you're still following this blog then you deserve to be among the first to hear the big news - we've started the process to adopt our 3rd baby! We often thought Lillian would be an only child. Our family felt so complete with our little girl to dote upon. Everything was perfect according to OUR plan. But once she earned her angel wings, our hearts were opened. We realized that with the work and worry of parenthood comes utter joy. Though we don't think we're cut out to parent a large brood, we definitely want Ian to have the opportunity to share a close relationship with a sibling like we do with ours. While I would again like to plan each twist and turn on this road to parenthood, there is so much about adoption that is uncertain. So, we're jumping back into the process and leaving the timing in God's hands. (As it should be.)

We ordered the paperwork on July 17th. As this is our third time, much of the paperwork just needed updating. We also had to order certified copies of our Marriage License and Birth Certificates in addition to getting fingerprints taken. (That my friends is the glamorous side of the process.) Just two weeks later, Jeff delivered the initial paperwork and fingerprints to the agency.

The agency then informed that the state now requires 10 hours of adoption training for each family. I asked whether they wanted us to attend the seminar or teach it at this point. (Fortunately she laughed.) So we enrolled in what turned out to be a very introductory class on August 15th followed by about 4 hours of homework. I wish I could say it was a thought provoking course but instead it felt like just another check in a box.

And now, we wait for our first appointment with the counselor. We've tentatively scheduled it for this Wednesday but are waiting for the counselor to return from vacation to confirm the appointment. Fortunately we've been assigned the same counselor as our prior two adoptions so it feels very comfortable.

We don't know whether this journey will take three months or three years but as always, we'll keep you up to date on the process through this blog.

Happy Father's Day

We just got back from a walk and decided to pick up the mail. Lo and behold, there was an envelope from our attorney...

IT'S OFFICIAL!!!

The Honorable Diana Stuart signed the General Judgment of Adoption on June 11, 2008. What an appropriate day to receive the news. Happy Father's Day!

Home Visit #2

Our second and final post-placement home visit was yesterday. It was somewhat ironic that I had to take a half day off from work on my second day back. But since I came in for a half day meeting last week, I'm calling it even. Anyway, the home visit was again brief and painless. There is certainly less anxiety when you already have the baby. The pre-adoption meetings feel a little more like interviews. Like if the counselor doesn't like you then there will be no baby. I know that's not true but it doesn't stop me from worrying a bit. But with the post-placement visits, I pick up a little but there is not nearly as much cleaning involved. The level of cleanliness is my anxiety gauge I guess.

The second visit is done at 2 months and preferably after the 2-month doctor appointment so that they can get the latest height and weight info. The counselor asks about any medical problems, daily routines and bonding. I guess they want to make sure that the baby is developing normally and that we are all feeling like a family. Like I said, these are pretty easy questions folks. Ian was having a particularly good nap so he managed to sleep through the entire visit. After a half hour, the final post-placement home visit unceremoniously concluded with a "thanks" and "good luck." It's so funny how much anticipation and excitement accompany the process before the placement. Then once the baby arrives, the process doesn't seem as important. In our hearts, Ian is already completely and forever ours. Alas we have a couple more months before the legal system agrees with us.

At this point the counselor will type up the visit notes and send them to our attorney for filing. This is the last step before a judge can finalize the adoption. Of course, that will still take a few months. With Lillian, it took 6 months before the adoption was finalized but we are using a different attorney with Ian's adoption and he thinks it will only take 3-4 months this time. So we're at least halfway there! Again, the finalization is rather unceremonious. One day we'll open the mailbox to find the signed adoption paperwork and birth certificate. And with that one envelope, we will be legally Ian's parents for life.

2 Week Visit

We had our 2 week follow up visit with the counselor last week. The whole thing took about 15 minutes and involved questions such as:

• Ian's height/weight at birth and now
• Any health issues
• How are we bonding with Ian
• How is the relationship with his birthfamily

Pretty painless really. We have another visit scheduled at the 2 month mark. In the meanwhile our attorney has filed the paperwork. The adoption should be finalized in about 3 months. Yeah!!!

Ashley and her dad are coming up this weekend for their first visit since Ian arrived. We are so excited to see them again! Ian is growing like a weed and I'm sure they will be amazed at how much he's changed in just 3 weeks.